Humor and Inspiration
The Humor and Inspiration content is fictitious and is presented here solely for the purpose of entertainment. Comments and opinions expressed herein do not necessarily reflect those of the Voice of Freedom or its advertisers.
The Dead Duck
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon.
As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest. After a silent moment, the vet shook his head and sadly said, “I am sorry, your duck is dead.”
The woman protested, “How can you be so sure? You haven’t done any testing on him.
“Retarded” Grandparents
Written by a third grader, on what his grandparents do.
After Christmas, a teacher asked her young pupils how they spent their holidays away from school. One child wrote the following:
”We always used to spend the holidays with Grandma and Grandpa. They used to live in a big brick house, but Grandpa got retarded and they moved to Arizona. Now they live in a tin b
Salesmanship!
The children filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship.
Little Sally led off: "I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "My sales approach was to appeal to the customer's civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious succes
A Compendium of Pontifications
- I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
- Police were called to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
- Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
- The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
- To write with a broken pencil is poi
Five Minute Management Course
Lesson 1
A man is getting into the shower, just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
When she opens the door, there stands David, the next-door neighbour.
Before she says a word, David says, “I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.”
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Obama at the Pearly Gates
When Obama died, George Washington met him at the Pearly Gates. He slapped him across the face and yelled, "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive?"
Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and shouted, "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed."
James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said, "T
Why God made Moms!
Answers given by 2nd grade schoolchildren to the following questions:
Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for
MORE ARTICLES
- Quantum teleportation achieved over Internet for the first time!
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- Federal agents bust Texas-based narcotics trafficking ring!
- Changing the Values of Society
- Changing the Values of Society
- NYC criminal squatter finds new home in prison for taking over someone’s family house!
- DEI in airlines has haunting effect on veteran pilots!
- Commentary: Bankers are now abandoning Net Zero!
- Humor: Elon Musk disguises IRS building as Tesla dealership so Democrats will burn it down!
- Stupid man in orange pants denies to cops that he keyed a Tesla while still wearing the orange pants!
- Harvard is now offering remedial math courses!
- Hollywood’s biggest Trump critics now plead for his help against AI copyright threat!
- Commentary: Chatbots are replacing therapists faster than anyone expected!
- Grisly extermination camp found In Mexico!
- State Farm insurance executive blames Kalifornia fire victims for their losses!
- Chinese firm has revealed an upgraded android that is able to learn and perform any movement!
- Woman scolds Muslim who insists he is fasting so she should take her lunch somewhere else!
- Texas rancher killed near border in IED attack by cartel terrorist!
- NASA supercomputer reveals strange structure at the edge of the Solar System!
- Trump wins defamatory lawsuit against Pulitzer Prize Board for maintaining debunked Russian collusion theory!
- Investigation confirms crime family boss Joe Biden was behind the FBI raid at Trump Florida home!
- Scientists switch cancer tumor cells back to healthy ones at a key moment!
- Kamala Harris delivers a fresh new word salad at a Broadway musical!
- Commentary: What Julian Assange was really doing!
- JD Vance’s 12-year-old relative is unlawfully denied a heart transplant due to her unvaccinated status!
- Artificial Intelligence uncovers hidden genetic clues that challenge COVID-19 origins!
- The disturbing truth about the home you think you own!
- Did Kari Lake really lose in November?
- President Trump withdraws from UN Human Rights Council and ends funding to UNRWA!
- Joy Villa stuns on the Grammys red carpet and praises Trump deportations!
- Trump says DC Blackhawk was flying too high... by a lot!
- Huttle pardoned by Trump for January 6 riot is killed by cops during traffic stop!
- House passes immigrant detention bill that would be Trump's first law to sign!
- All DEI offices to be closed by Wednesday with workers placed on paid leave!
- Trump revokes security clearances of all 51 spies who lied and John Bolton!
- Globalists surrender to President Trump!
- Commentary: Defining the Deep State!
- Mel Gibson reveals astounding way three friends cured their cancers!
- How one sailor survived 76 days lost at sea after colliding with a whale!
- TV host Mike Rowe wants us to ask this question about AI technology!
- The island we saved and then surrendered!
- Annexing Canada would be like adding a second Kalifornia!
- Commentary: Multiple landmarks struck by lightning on New Years Eve!
- Disgraced “Today” show anchorman Matt Lauer now faces allegations of sheep abuse!
- Latest Arctic ice data show 26% larger than in 2012!
- Hydrogen hidden beneath the Earth's surface could power the entire planet for 200 years!
- Commentary: Quantum teleportation has begun to change the world!
- Actor Denzel Washington gets baptized and becomes a Minister!
- Commentary: Justice has departed Amerika; will it return?
- Stephanopoulos may be done at ABC News after $15 million Trump-defamation settlement!
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"We now live in a state of permanent war - a global arms industry, apparently the largest single international business, must have its products used up so more can be sold. There must be profits for the capitalists and jobs for the proles... Are we not still in Caligula's Rome?"
— David Watson, New Internationalist
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