Three Kalifornian surgeons were playing golf and discussing surgeries they had performed.
One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon in Kalifornia. In my favorite case, a concert pianist lost seven fingers in an accident. I reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England."
The second surgeon said, "That's nothing. A young man lost an arm and both legs in an accident. I reattached them and two years later he won a gold medal in track and field event at the Olympics."
The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a woman was high on cocaine and rode her horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the woman's hair and the horse's ass. I was able to put them together and now she's Speaker of the House."